A Cascade of Misfortunes

Time: 11:00 a.m.
Event: Cut-out cookie failure. Lindsay's traditional cut-out cookie recipe turned out too dry, sweet, sticky, and crunchy. Cookies were inedible unless the cookie-eater needed a serious and painful jaw work-out. No cut-out cookies will be had by any Colvin/Reitmeier/Halls or any History department employees.

Time: 12:00 p.m.
Event: Diva Dogs is not answering their phone. They did not answer yesterday either. Finlay is forced to take a last-minute grooming appointment at the Petsmart on Harbison, possibly the biggest traffic debacle at any given moment in the city of Columbia and 20 minutes from home. Appointment time: 5:00 p.m.

Time: 12:30 p.m.
Event: Nick takes Lindsay's car to be washed and detailed for the big trip to Texas. It has now rained off and on since 3:00 p.m. It is now 9:00 p.m.

Time: 2:00 p.m.
Event: Photo-op for someone's Christmas gift (a picture frame). We are already so behind schedule that we are having to miss a friend's Christmas party. Boo. However, this picture is essential. Cloudy skies, wind, humid temperatures, and uncooperative Finlay led to a hot temper on Lindsay's part and severe frustration for Nick. The final picture featured only Nick and Lindsay.

Time: 3:00 p.m.
Event: Last minute errands. We got in the Gourmet Shop and Three Dog Bakery, but forgot the most essential stop - the pharmacy. Didn't realize this until later. It would later involve an extra hour on the road, a pharmacy which closes at 6 p.m. and a locked cabinet which further complicated the process.

Time: 4:45 p.m.
Event: We tried to develop the picture we'd taken previously while Finlay was being groomed. We'd been told it would take from 4:30 until 8:00. We had lots of time to kill. Publix, despite advertising photo services, did not in fact offer photo services of any kind. We trekked a few blocks down to Target, which did offer services. They were just slow to render them. We finally got the picture printed, paid for it, and then looked down to realize that I had lipstick - bright red lipstick - on my front teeth. Picture is now worthless and all effort spent in procuring it is an utter waste.

Time: 6:00 p.m.
Event: Following a nice dinner, we decide to return to Columbia proper to pick up my prescription, which must be filled no later than today. Arrive at CVS at 6:30 to find the pharmacy closed. Recognizing our predicament concerning lack of prescription's benefits, we seek out alternatives. All alternatives are locked in a glass cabinet which must be opened by an "associate." It wasn't worth it.

Time: 6:45 p.m.
Event: Returning to check on Finlay at the groomer's we pass no fewer than 4 wrecks. One was a flipped car. One was a car with its entire back crushed in. We feared for our lives as we headed back to the gauntlet that is Harbison Blvd.

Time: 7:00 p.m.
Event: Checking in on Finlay. Thinking that 2 1/2 hours is always more than enough time for Diva Dogs to complete the job we decide to check in with Fin and see if he might be finished early. He was not. We were told so in no uncertain terms. Our anxiety and frustration was not quelled when we were told that one reason he would be ready, actually later than expected, was that the groomer "didn't actually know he was there." Not kidding. He, in fact, would now be ready not a minute before 8:30.

Time: 8:30
Event: Rescuing our precious baby from the evil Petsmart groomers. Finlay is brought out to us smelling like cheap gas station coconut car freshener and still quite damp. Are you kidding me?! They had my small dog for 4 and a half hours and couldn't bathe and dry him completely?! Petsmart groomers. You are worthless.

We're going to bed now, before anything else can happen.